Why women have affairs?
Speak about a loaded topic that no one wants to talk about, that’s it. Amusing thing, extramarital affairs have been going on since millennium. Affairs can be fraught with evils, cause despair, and other problems. Plus you have to wrap your maind around all the other issues, there’s that truth and openness thing, finances, age difference, spiritual background, guilt, and on and on. I suppose there will be some strong opinions about some of this.
For the intention of this post I will identify an affair as a long term, maybe years long relationship of a sexual nature between two people of whom one or both are married to other persons, married woman date.
Why do women have affairs? There are as many answers as there are man seeking woman for affair. I am sure generally though it is only the human condition, the need for care, belonging, to be wanted and cared for, the caring for others and wanting to be loved and respected. Here are a several explanations I have run across.
Biologically we as human beings are all sexual creatures. Nature has us set up to reproduce, to have sex. Sex is pleasurable and fun, and sex makes us get away the real world for a brief period of time. This ecstasy exists for whatever amount of time we are able to keep the adrenalin levels high enough. Someone can switch the longing on and off, some are excellent at controlling it and others are so-so at best. Though we all have it, young and old, able bodied and not so able. It is the Human condition. For some of us it is the sex act itself that drives us. For some of us it is the excitement of the chase. For some of us it is the seduction, for some it is the caring for another individual, for some it is the longing to be appreciatedloved, for some it is the total romance thing. These wishes and yearnings can be so strong they rise above the taboos the world has erected against affairs. For many individuals the yearnings will defeat their doubts and make them risk the wrath of not only their family, but society as well. So why, what is the catalyst?
Sex Addicts, probably some of us are. Sex is terribly good, better then drugs, a natural high. If you are in this group of biologically motivated sex addicts and can find away to have sex and not harm your relatives or anybody else? You would need to lessen the hazard you are taking. If you have the feeling that a good affair is one that is advantageous to everybody, then good luck.
No love at home, or no romance. I suppose this is the major cluster, very big truly. There are many couples whose marriage is over, but they are comfortable in the manner they live, and upsetting the extended families is not on their list of things they wish to do. You love your other half but there is no romance. Then there are the children to think about. Your assets are so entangled. You need the medical insurance, and so on. There are a lot of reasons to stay together besides love and sex.
Bodily reasons, there are some people who can not have sex. They have physical circumstances that prevent them completing the sex operation, at least not with their spouse. An extra-marital affair occasionally solves the problem while keeping the marriage intact.
Ignoring, sadly this is a regular reason I fear. One or the other, frequently the gentleman is sexually neglecting his female for a number of reasons. As a man I truly am thankful to you guys neglecting your ladies and making them obtainable to us men of romance, making them “milfs” But I still think it is despicable that you are neglectful. Also there is the spouse who is neglectful until the wife or husband has an affair, then they condemn them for doing so, when they where the catalyst. Those who neglect, then condemn, are not only neglectful, but malevolent.
Something is just missing in the marriage, I can not put my finger on it, but its not there. Probably its romance that is missing, could be it is a lack of love, maybe compassion is disappeared, could be it is the intimacy, could be neglect. Maybe we have simply developed apart, our ordinary concerns diverged. Could be it is that what I want, and what I want to do the rest of my life, is opposed to of what you want. Maybe I simply don’t know what I want from the marriage anymore. Could be, just maybe I miss that feeling that when I am with you, it just feels right.
The number one reason people give is, they search for the passion that is missing and so very much longed for.
There are other reasons, the feeling of power, to run off, for financial gain, for payback and so on. I am sure there are more reasons why people have affairs then these. I only stop because if this gets too long no one will read it.
Tags: affairs, Dating, dating married people, extramarital affairs, Marriage, married dating, seeking an affair